162: The Hole (A)

Guy #1.  Getting tackled.  He's Desmond Harrington.  You know, the guy from Wrong Turn who drives his mustang into a van full of hippies during the first scene, only to learn he must then survive a forest totally loaded with demented half-breed-wielding-excellent-bow-skills-having weirdlings.  Yeah, that's him in 2001 in that picture getting tackled.  Wrong Turn didn't debut until 2 years (2003) later.  He plays the famous kid of a rock star, with emaciated cheeks and a boyish charm.  Charm that can barely be seen due to it's depth - deep within a soul of a well rounded middle-aged man - learned by experience but stunted by age - still living in his area high school.  Well rounded because he's the son of a rock star mind you, not because he's actually too old for the part.

Guy #2.  The one doing the tackling.  He's the friend of Guy #1.  He gets pissed when he's supposed to get pissed, gets drunk when he's supposed to get drunk, is horny all the time, and gets crazy with venom when he's stuck in a hole for days on end.

Girl In Background #1: That's Thora Birch.  Good actress who's in a bunch of stuff, most notably American Beauty.  She plays the main character.  A girl who is on the cusp of a win.  A girl who sees a challenge, yet is stymied by life.

Not pictured Girl #2: Keira Knightley.  Otherwise known as famous girl from Bend it like Beckham and Domino.  She plays the Heathers-like girl, full with sweater and quirky smile.  She is the "it" girl, the one that all guys want.  All guys that is but the ones without organs between their running sticks.  She gets what she wants obviously - and does so with a cute accent and the synonym for charm.

Far Guy In A Distance #3: this is Martyn Taylor, played by Daniel Brocklebank.  Martyn is in love with Girl In Background #1 and he would do anything for her.  Anything......

Put them all in a hole/bunker in the middle of nowhere, minus Far In A Distance Guy #3, and throw away the key...

The Gore Gore Girls (Special Edition) / #161 (C-)

Oh dear God.....straight wowzer!  Some of this was totally unnecessary and WAY over the top.  For instance, the salt and pepper added onto the buttox.  Honestly!?!?!  Salt and Pepper!?!?  They even pushed the limits when they alluded that the one dancer was about to use that cucumber for something....uh, well....okay I'll move on.  But just know that I'm not kidding.  1972 folks!

This movie has some huge balls...more than I've seen in a long time.  That does not mean I'm recommending viewers to partake.  It was a bit like Pink Flamingoes, but in the horror movie genre.  The "acting" outside of the murder scenes was really bad.  And the film quality, production and editing was even worse than the acting, but I suppose that was to be expected.  But then they get to the killings....which were just totally brutal.  Unnecessarily long, with squishing sounds....taking things way too far.  Its sort of funny because at first they do the typical 70's horror movie "move" by not showing most of the actual murder scene - but then they go farther and show all kinds of gruesome craziness after the actor has already died (here is where the squishing noises come into play).  Completely out of control.  I can see why this movie caused controversy and is listed as NR.

For the record, I shut my eyes twice during my viewing.  I also decided to have a snack midway through...some creamy cucumbers cut up and spread on bread....then I almost threw up the cucumber spread when the champagne glass scene occurred.  Especially as the 2nd glass was filling up.  Holy crap....why?  Followed directly by the french fry scene?!?  Ugh.

You know, I got what I deserved by watching this mess.  I got sick to my stomach and I got bad acting.  But damn, some of the scenes were just so freaking crazy.  I can't stop saying that.  I guess for those of my friends out there that like horror - you have to check this out....but perhaps just temper your expectations and maybe you should fast-forward a lot and make the entire movie last 20 minutes.

My favorite part of this film was that the main detective guy looked at the camera twice and talked to the viewer.  That is pretty funny if you ask me.

key words: eye popping (multiple), ironing of face, french frying face....salt and pepper